Am I really doing this? It’s official. I am writing my first blog and I now have “BLOG” as a heading on my website. I’m all in. Fully committed. To be honest, I haven’t written in a while. I’ve avoided social media for the past six months because it’s a time suck, and I’d rather be walking barefoot in the rain than staring down at my phone, helping gravity pull my face toward the earth faster. Furthermore, it seems like every time I comment on a social media post, it’s usually about something that is or could be perceived as political. I often regret it and either face the wrath of an acquaintance turned hater or delete it immediately. I tried to write a book. I’ve been trying for many years. I haven’t done it for various reasons.
The fact that I am sitting here, writing a blog post, is something that I didn’t anticipate, and I’m feeling a sense of wonder that this is happening. What do you know? That’s how mindfulness ties in with writing my first blog post. That first paragraph is my autopilot rambling around in my head, focused on the past, evaluating, and being snarky. Writing out the words I hear in my head allows me to look at my autopilot in a new way, through keystrokes and letters marching along to the end of the sentence. A new line, each letter standing like a soldier falling into formation, one after another.
I can hear and feel my fingertips tap-tap on each of the keys and watch what shows up on the screen. Hey look! Another paragraph! I think I’m getting the hang of this. I’m not really thinking about whether I need to erase anything or how silly this might sound. I just noticed that I haven’t indulged in proofreading while I’m writing, like I normally do. I’m just allowing my fingers to type the thoughts – now that I’m officially a blogger. Mindfully blogging.
That’s what mindfulness is, “Paying attention on purpose to the unfolding of experience from moment to moment,” a definition I often borrow from the great Jon Kabat Zin. One “n” or two? I will check that when I’m done. But for now, I am writing. And I don’t hate it. Yet. (Judgement.)
And here we are.
(FYI – It’s John Kabat-Zinn)